When I started Vessel Talent, I fully expected that I was going to accelerate my professional and entrepreneurial career. With Week 5 now in the books, I can definitively confirm that I’ve learned more in this past month than my past 2 years at Facebook. Easily.

With growth, there were more hours.

With more hours, there was less time.

What I didn’t expect was how less time and added pressure from my professional world would lead to some surprising changes in my personal and spiritual growth as well.

Two major themes that highlighted these learnings:

1 – Saying No leads to more Yes’s. (I know that’s corny but I’m keeping it).

2 – Choosing to rest.

Follow along so I can share a bit more on what that means.

Saying No

“Man, I wish I possessed Kobe’s ability to be able to sleep 4 hours and still operate at the level that he does,” I told my wife one night. She gives a forgiving laugh as I laid stressed out in bed thinking what 4 extra hours could add to my life!

In this past month, however, what I’ve come to realize is that it’s not about adding more time but more about being disciplined to say no. Every no leads to a yes to something that I want to, dare I say the P-word, prioritize.

It’s quite simple really and there’s nothing new that every productivity book/coach/podcast hasn’t already covered on this subject but for me, something changed from head knowledge to real action once I started to just have less time in my mornings and evenings.

With less time, I quite literally could not say yes to the things that would take time away from the things I prioritized.

Priorities include my 1:1 time with God, 8 hours of sleep, date nights, conversations with my wife and exercise.

Plus all the other life stuff with walking the dog, searching for real estate investment deals, doing community with my church and work friends, reading, etc.

Which has led me to saying no to the following:

• Snooze button
• Instagram
• Vegging out on weekdays watching basketball, especially Laker games
• Last-minute grocery shopping, cooking and eating less fast food
• Completely cutting out Reddit, especially the NBA subreddit
• Random Youtube videos (#1 struggle right now – working on it!!)

For me, this is a miracle y’all.

I’ve always kind of despised that part of me where I talk a big talk but the reality of my habits was that I was a giant procrastinator who struggled to do anything consistently.

I know I’m only a month in but it’s been so gradual yet so rewarding to see this habitual cycle build day by day, week by week. I kind of always dreamed of actually maximizing out my days with productive, effective work but was never able to get there because of excuses XY&Z.

So is the answer always, hey just get busier? For some, maybe. I think there was a reason why I was never able to make real change when I was at Facebook when things were just generally slower so this applies to me. For others, it may just mean making a conscious decision to start cutting stuff out, even if it’s just 1% better each day.

My Dad tells me all the time, “Albuhh (that’s me mimicking his Chinese accent), God gives everybody 24 hours. It’s up to you to decide how you want to use it.”

Thanks, Dad.

So yeah, things have been great on the personal development side. In exchange for missing on some Instagram FOMO and probably some epic Lebron to AD all-oops, I’ve fallen more in love with Noelle, I’ve gotten healthier (shoutout to eating more veggies and the Nike Training Club app) and I know how to cook just a tad better.

What will this look like a year from now if I’m able to stay consistent in these new changes? I’m stoked to find out.

God & Rest

The beautiful thing that comes out of any kind of suffering, no matter what degree it registers is that it narrows our focus to God. It creates a different kind of desperation on wanting to draw near Him, to make space amongst all the noise to surrender to all that He is.

The first week and a half were honestly miserable. Part of it was adjusting to a new sleeping schedule which has given me a new level of empathy of babies (and their parents of course). Part of it was coming unattached to the Facebook umbilical cord of free food, unlimited snacks and drinks and all the other perks of big tech. But most of it was just the chasmic gap that was created between what my 2 clients expected from me to be an expert in my field, make key decisions, deliver results and what I knew I could in reality do. Gulp – hello imposter syndrome.

The unknown is typically where anxiety broods and skyrockets but I’ve found that it’s also where I get the incredible opportunities to re-affirm who I am in Christ (identity) and why I chose this path (purpose).

At Facebook it was harder to surrender each day as it came. It was just more predictable job as I’m sure most corporate jobs are. But if I had to admit some of my past ego and pride here, it was a job that I just didn’t need much of God for. For where I was in life as a late 20’s DINK-er with all the freedom in the world, I was just living too comfortable and too dependent on me.

As I reflect on how overwhelming each day has been since starting this venture, it amazes me how much my focus has changed from future, is-the-half-over-yet to just taking it day-by-day and even sometimes, hour-byhour. Verses like, “Your Kingdom come, your will be done” and “don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries” become much more applicable and powerful in helping me overcome what’s on the plate for the day. It’s crazy. The Bible truly becomes alive when its applied and the words drip into the innermost parts of my heart, mind, soul outwardly through my perspectives and actions.

With all that said, perhaps the single most life-changing lesson from starting this new venture has been around this concept of rest.

Let me just preface by giving a little plug to John Mark Comer’s book, The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry. I’ve got the link already embedded for you so go check it out. Buy it. It’s a quick read but it’ll change something in you.

Rest.

As my capacity at work, church community, marriage and everything else I have my hands in grows, I realize more than ever how much more space I need to carve out to just be still.

To unplug, stop hustling, stop grinding and just receive.

To escape to my quiet place just as Jesus did so often to just spend time with His Father.

My jar needs to be filled with the right stuff of God’s genuine love, peace, and wisdom. In fact, I need that to overflow so that I can pour it out into my work, the candidates I speak with, the hiring managers I’m building teams with, my community and my wife. Not another Netflix show, more movies, all day binges of sports and whatever give-me-your-attention pieces of media that is so deliciously tempting to swallow.

I need my recharge that can’t be found in anything else but that of my Father. The vacations, the wine, the massage and, whatever escape comes to mind is only a temporary answer. Don’t get me wrong, these are great things to have but it’s just an answer and not the answer.

Rest comes in the morning when it’s silent, before the day of calls, meetings, Linkedin InMailing has begun. It comes on Sunday when we’ve intentionally decided to do all our cooking, grocery shopping, cleaning, and laundry the day before so that we can spend all day being completely disconnected from work, from our phones and to just be still. To worship, to thank, to praise, to be present with each other, with my Father, my pup and my amazing VIVE Church community.

I’m on this journey for the long run and I fully expect things to only get crazier as things progress. But crazy can be handled when there’s deliberate time that’s prioritized to rest, each day, each week, each month till we finish the year.

I’m saying no to more things and choosing to rest while in the middle of the storm. It’s been a transformative month and worth every micro decision thus far.

Don’t be like me in waiting till life and/or work actually gets busy. Start now, build the foundation because it will come. It always does.

What can you start saying no to? How can you start implementing some ways to rest and recharge?

Thanks for reading.

AL